I am a Hypocrite
Lord, I write about grace, preach to others on grace, yet struggle with waves of doubt, and wonder if I am good enough to receive your favor.
I write about laughter, fill my stories with chuckles to bring others to places of joy, yet sink in despair. I cover my face in my hands and weep for grief that I’ve disappointed You, worry that my babies are hurting, or rail over the state of our nation.
I am a hypocrite, Lord. Rescue me from my untruthful self. Am I full of grace, sharing with others, or trying to convince myself? Am I brimming with joy and want others to join me in the dance, or trying to help myself up from my own pit?
Fix Me, Please
You know me, and what how best to fix me and make me true. Will you fix me, please? I can't fix myself.
When I measure me by the standard I’ve set for me, I am crooked, broken, a mess. So I need You to measure me by the standard You have set for me, and show me how You see me.
Only then can I be whole and free to share with others the real me—the me I am becoming through Your love.
Dancing with Abandon
Only then will I write words that speak of grace from a full heart, laughter from a full soul. I will dance with abandon and others will join me.
This is a prayer I wrote during a class at the Indianapolis Writers Conference last weekend. I love the concept of written prayers. They not only reveal our heart to ourselves and lift our thoughts to God, but help others grow.
Do you write your prayers? How does it help you in your walk with God?