Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Three Ideas to Defuse (Someone Else's) Jealousy

Are you ever jealous of friends who make the publishing process look like eating a Twinkie?” my friend asked.

            I didn’t even need to think about my answer. “Of course. I feel like, ‘What is wrong with me, that it took me ten years to birth one baby, and they are cranking out three books a year while homescooling five kids and training penguins to juggle for their church’s fall extravaganza.?’”

            Her sigh of relief was thick. It does feel good to know we’re not alone.

            But what if we find ourselves on the other side of the latte from someone whose soul seethes with jealousy because of our success? And what if that someone is a dear friend or family member? How do we overcome the hurt, confusion and feelings of betrayal when another is jealous of us?


1.      Pray for them. 
We know from our own anguish during jealous times how awful it feels to covet someone else’s success. Just as praying for those we are jealous of softens our hearts toward them, If we pray for the person who’s jealous of us, it opens doors of blessing for them and shuts doors of resentment in our hearts.
2.      Brag on them
Insecurity and lack of trust for their future success can trigger jealousy. If we affirm the person who is jealous of us, it will help them relax and trust the Lord that He has good plans for all His kids, not only a select group.  

      3.      Help them

     Are there ways we can aid fellow travelers in their own journey? Introduce them to someone who can help them, loan them a book, or share a trade secret. It will diffuse their jealousy, and make the devil mad he ever messed with us.

And if there’s anything I love, it’s upsetting Satan.


Have you experienced someone being jealous of you? How did that make you feel? What did you do? Any suggestions for diffusing jealousy that I missed?