Friday, September 18, 2009

Saying No: Painful or Wonderful?

Do you have a difficult time saying “no?” If you’re like me, you want to make the people in your life happy. Sometimes following the Lord’s plan and pleasing people cannot go hand­-in-hand, especially if you are committed to writing a certain amount of words per day, or working under a deadline. Or simply staying sane. Aha.

What are some things you’ve had to say “no” to lately? Were you okay saying that, or was it tough for you? Does it get easier the more you say it?


  1. I've not had to say no lately, I mean, I've not said no lately! :)

    It's hard, I really don't want to disappoint anyone. My way of thinking is that if the person came to me, it's because they trust me to do it and they depend on me; I should be honored!


  2. Oh goodness. I am definitely a people pleaser, through and through. I can't remember the last time I said no to someone. :( It is definitely something I need to learn!

  3. It is such a healthy boundary to say no at times, but unfortunately, I don't do it often enough. :O)

  4. Ooh, I love this background! Very pretty.

    I use to have a lot of trouble uttering that one, short word. But as I've grown and become more assertive (and become a mom), it seems I use it much more easily. A lot of times, it translates to "not right now," and I dislike that.

    Have a great weekend, Jen!

  5. I've gotten pretty good at saying no so I can keep focus on top priorities. I say it often to my children (HA) and recently told the PTO no and childcare at our church no (b/c I volunteer in other areas).

    I mentally tell myself no a lot too. No TV, workout instead. No blogging, go write. No more dinner, I'm full....

    I love God's leading and when I actually listen.
    ~ Wendy

  6. Hi Jen,

    Stopping by from ACFW to say Hi! Got up WAY too early this morning and have a little time before all of the activities of the day start! That time change (two hours for me) is a killer!

    Love that picture! And it looks like you're making some steady progress on your book! Whoo-hoo! Stay strong. You have a lot to juggle, but you're doing what God wants and not everyone can understand that. It'll be easier for them once your book is out.

  7. Hi, Jeannie!

    I've had to learn how to say "no". The best thing I did was asking people to protect me, to not ask me to do something unless it was super important. I learned the hard way that I will run my body into the ground if I don't take time to rest.

  8. Hi Jeanette -

    Oooh, Kristen's method is great! Instead of saying "no," ask people to "protect" you.

    The only thing I've had to dodge in recent weeks I can't divulge. It was tough because the person really meant well.

    Hey, congrats! You're up to 50 followers!

    Susan :)

  9. Let's see. I have to say no all the time! To my kids, to wonderful requests from deserving people, to volunteer opportunities. I'd love to say yes to them.

    It would shortchange the people and volunteer work I'm already committed to, so I decline gracefully. Tough calls.

    Have a wonderful weekend!

  10. Such a short little word yet so hard to say. I am terrible at it. People pleasing runs thick in my blood. It is something I constantly have an internal struggle about.

  11. I learned 2 months ago how to say NO to a lot of things, & the lesson will stick! Good hard lesson learned. Have a lovely weekend. TTFN ~Marydon

    PS love the little critter with the puffy cheeks.

  12. Saying no was easy for me. I have really never been a people pleaser. I used to say life was to short to do what you don't want and be around people you don't like. My thinking and way of life is much more compassionate now and I find more ways to say yes. I find that as long as you don't compromise or wear yourself out saying yes can be a good thing.

  13. First of all, I love your blog, I love your critter pictures so much, and I love your heart. Can't wait to see a book from you.

    I do find that it gets easier saying "no" after a few times. Sometimes you have to think it and not volunteer. God has given me three priorities for fall, and I must put them first. That makes it easier.

  14. I deal with fibromyalgia, all my friends know this. Mornings are not good for me. I miss out on certain events because of this. And they all know I write, so they try to be considerate.

  15. It gets easier to say no. I try hard not to feel guilty afterward but I have come to know what I can and can't do--most times:)


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