Lucky Ducks: The Joys of Unasked-for Advice

Those Lucky Ducks!

Ah, the joys of unasked-for advice. I love it when people tell me things I don’t want to know, for my own good. In one recent case, for the good of some ducks.

 

When I shared on Facebook my plan to picnic at a park and feed ducks on Mother’s Day, a friend advised, “Take WHOLE GRAIN crackers for the ducks.” Oh, of course. I wouldn’t dream of giving wild ducks anything less than the finest crackers, especially since some of them might be mothers!

That experience reminded me of some other bits of unsolicited wisdom, which I freely share with you. I’m sure you enjoy people advising you as much as I do.



"Oh, no! Don't name me that!"

When I was a mother-to-be: “If you have a girl, you should name her Kevina, after her  daddy (my husband’s name is Kevin). And if I’d married Brad, would you tell me to name my baby Bradina? Aha.

"Let's confuse our editors!"

As a writer: “If your husband doesn’t support your writing, divorce him.” Oh, I see—this way I can support myself financially as well as emotionally. How clever. From the same writing guru: “Don’t read books on how to improve your writing skills. They’ll only confuse you.” All righty, then, I’ll stay a mediocre writer, and confuse all the editors I send my stories to. That’ll show ‘em!

When I had a cold: “Tie a bunch of garlic around your neck.” Yippee. Then I can have the entire universe to myself, and rest all I want!

I know, I know. People who give unasked-for advice are striving to obey God’s command to love one another, and only wish to help. I sincerely appreciate that. As I’m sure the ducks will, when they munch down their whole grain crackers.

What is your favorite or funniest bit of unasked-for advice?