I didn’t want to stop. My husband had been trying to coax me to give it up for months, years in fact.
Questions burned in my conscience: How would I explain the change to people? Who would take my place? Wouldn’t I be turning my back on a calling of the Lord, being unfaithful to the singing talent He’d given me?
Finally realizing I wasn’t doing the Lord or His sheep any favors by spreading myself so thin, I relented. I quit leading worship on Sunday mornings. Ahhh… the peace in my soul shouts its thanks.
Now I can attend worship without the pressure of leading music to a crowd of non-musical saints, half of whom never sing. I can stand in my own pew in the second row, lift my hands in praise to Jesus, and forget about everyone else.
Just me and my Shepherd. I love it.
Sound kinda selfish? I understand why it might.
But… after ten years of leading, struggling to exemplify how to enter into worship, wearying myself to wring expensive wine out of Mountain Dew cans, I had to face the truth: God may have gifted me with a nice singing voice, I may love to worship Him, but I must admit when I’m not bearing fruit, and step down.
This isn’t bowing to defeat. It’s spending my talents in ways that bring me and others joy. It’s freeing me to focus on teaching, which I love, and writing, which I love more. And I can sing when I travel and speak, or for weddings and funerals. So there.
Have you ever had to eliminate a ministry or task after realizing it was draining you? Was it tough to step down?
