I Love My Hips!

#holidayweightgain #largehips #Christmas #grandkids

For the first time in decades, I’m not worried about my hips getting larger as the holidays approach. I love my hips. I feel sorry for all those skinny-as-a-preacher’s-wallet supermodels slinking down the runway in their pencil skirts. They’ve never discovered the splendid uses of hips.

Copyright Ron Levellie 2012

In my hipless days, if I wanted to tote a box of Christmas decorations from the backyard shed to the house, I had to carry it in both arms, like a hug. Made navigating across the yard a bit rough since I couldn’t see where I was stepping. Now I simply perch the box on one hip, shelf-like, breeze across the yard, open the door with my free hand, and collapse into the room.

Hips are also useful for bouncing hungry or colicky babies while stirring macaroni on the stove. Without hips, you’d have to plunk junior or princess in their highchair and listen to them wail while you tried to fix supper. A ton of macaroni has been rescued from burning by the marvelous invention of hips.

 

I discovered my favorite use for hips on a recent visit to see my grandchildren. I sat down on a playground swing and realized there was no danger of me falling out, no matter how high I flew. My handy hips had me wedged in tighter than a sailor on shore leave. But I knew I’d never revert to being hipless again when my six-year-old grandson stepped behind me to push. In his innocent voice he said, “Grandma, you’re easy to push, because your bum is so big!”

 That’s why you won’t find me refusing mashed potatoes or eggnog this holiday season. How can I let my little guy down? I do wish they’d find a way to get me out of this swing, though.

Enjoy Your Noodles: A Story of Thankfulness

#thankfulness #noodles #Godisgood

America's Best Stew

The sign on the counter clinched my decision: “Our chicken stew voted one of America’s Top 10 Best Chicken Dishes by Redbook magazine.”  My imagination salivated. Plump chicken breast slices bumped into carrots. Potato and celery chunks jostled for position to the top of the bowl, showing off their muscles.

It was our first visit to this celebrated deli recommend by our friend, James.  We’d taken three wrong turns before we finally found it. But I knew my frustrations would melt away when that first bite of chicken stew hit my tongue.  I congratulated myself on my healthy selection, compared to my husband’s choice of a pastrami sandwich. Until I stared into my bowl. 

Nothing but noodles. 

Okay, that was a lie. Scraps of chicken and a slice or two of carrot hid next to scrawny excuses for celery. Apart from that, the noodle family and their one hundred and six shirttail relations swam in a lake of broth.

Pastrami piled high

Kevin charged into his five-inch mound of pastrami on rye, the spicy mustard dripping onto his moustache to mock me. “How is your sandwich, honey?”

“It’s great! I’m so glad we came here, Jeanette.” He wiped his mouth between bites. “It was worth all the trouble of finding it. You know, there aren’t many places that serve pastrami like this anymore. And just look how they piled it on.” How could he manage to get all those words out and all that food in at the same time? “I’m thankful to James for recommending this restaurant. Would you like a bite?”

“Oh, no, that’s okay.” I pretended not to mind that his taste buds were dancing in pastrami heaven while mine languished in…well.

His eyes closed in bliss while he took another bite. “How is your stew?”

“Well, I would hardly call it stew,” I whined. “I expected tons of veggies and huge chunks of chicken. This is barely more than a bowl of noodles splashed with chicken, and carrots tossed in for color.”  I kept my voice calm despite the stress of my enormous disappointment, so he wouldn’t feel badly.

Pastrami-induced joy

I needn’t have worried. No amount of discontent on my part could quench his pastrami-induced joy. 

After fishing every sliver of chicken and shadow of veggie in the pond of noodles while listening to the virtues of the best pastrami on earth on the freshest rye in the universe, I excused myself. Perhaps on my way to the ladies room I’d happen by a table recently vacated by people who left half a sandwich untouched. I could sneak it into my purse then eat it behind the stall door—with a napkin on my lap, of course. I’m no lowbrow, after all.

But my conscience—and the empty plates I passed—made my decision for me.  It seems the Lord had taken seriously my plea of “lead me not into temptation” 

While alone in the bathroom, I silently complained to the Lord about my stew. As He often does when my attitude is tacky, He spoke to me. I didn’t hear an audible voice, but way down on the inside of my insides, I sensed His kind, Daddy tone. 

My little talk with Jesus

“Enjoy your noodles,” He said. As flat and matter-of-fact as someone saying, “Here’s a napkin to wipe your chin.”

I blinked.  Well, of course. This is what I have in my bowl. Just because I expected a different meal, doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy these noodles. I should be thankful for food in my belly, not miffed because I didn’t get my way.

I returned to the table, inspired by my little bathroom talk with Jesus, and slurped down the
remainder of my lunch.  I grinned at Kevin and said, “This deli was an excellent choice! Thanks for paying, honey.”

“You’re welcome.” Even his pastrami breath didn’t faze me. Too much.       

“Be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you”  (Hebrews 13:5, NIV).

The above is a chapter from my book,
Two Scoops of Grace with Chuckles on Top


Happy Thanksgiving to You and Yours!

     

How to Attract More People

#attractiveness #lies #Jesus #innerlife

Do clothes make the person?

What attracts people to you? To a greater degree than marketing specialists and advertising managers would like you to know, what draws others to you is primarily on the inside. It’s hidden in your heart.

Our society spends billions of dollars and countless hours a year on clothes, make-up, shoes, hair products, and weight-loss programs to attract other people to us. And perhaps, if we'll admit it, to make ourselves feel more attractive, more lovable.

But the focus is on the parts—the outsides—that have little power to change a heart or make a life more meaningful.

Are you not bombarded daily with messages that if you buy the right shampoo, try the newest fail-proof diet, or wear the latest designer clothes, then you’ll draw the right people to your side who will give you ultimate happiness?

Those messages are lies. 

If Jesus Christ lives in you,
you posess the ultimate attractiveness 

The world and the god of the world—Satan—would like us to believe that when we have the ultimate head of hair or the perfect perfume, we are attractive. The truth of God’s word is that kindness, humility, and grace draw people to us. The inner qualities of Jesus’ Spirit at work in the secret places of our hearts make people want to be around us because they sense authenticity and warmth.

Let’s quit listening to the lies of society and Satan, and focus on what matters most: the hidden person of the heart, and the source of true attractiveness—the Lord Jesus Christ and His ways.

Have you ever known someone who was not attractive by worldly standards, but whom everyone wanted to be friends with, because they made people feel significant?